Right now, tell me something big that you want in life. It could be anything. Maybe you want to travel the world, live in another country, quit your job, move to a new city, start your own biz, pursue your passion, develop yourself more so that you can rise above all your blocks. Maybe you want to live more freely and have a freedom-filled lifestyle. That was my biggest dream.
How do you know if you’re really really ready to go for it?
It took me about 5 years from the start of wanting my own business and a life on my own terms to actually going for it full-force. While some might say I shouldn’t have waited that long, I would argue that I don’t think I was ready to take the leap for that entire period. Some of it though, absolutely.
Looking back, I can see there were definitive signs around when I should have taken the leap. (Fun fact – I didn’t voluntarily take it! I was more so forced by the universe into it! That was the sign that I waited TOO long.) For anyone out there who’s currently nursing a heavy decision in your heart and unsure of whether or not you should act on it, here’s the guideline I wish I had read at the time (with pretty sunrise pics from my travels in Belize to inspire you:)
How do you know if you’re ready to take the BIG scary leap?
1) You keep getting an intuitive, gut feeling to just GO for it
Maybe it doesn’t make sense, maybe the timing is all wrong, but your gut is urging you to do this despite all practical reasons to hold off. Our heads can tell us a million stories and lead us all over the place but our intuition is never wrong. If we can learn to relax and trust in those callings, we can naturally be lead to the best opportunities and decisions for us.
One time I felt so called to travel to Budapest during Christmas time. It kept coming up in my mind over and over to the point where I became a little obsessed with it. I read a blog post from someone on her experience in Budapest and the whole time my body was tingling. My intuition kept telling me to book a flight there, that if I went to Budapest during Christmas time something magical would happen. I did not know anything about the city, let alone country… but I went because I believe in following intuitive hits. And I met a guy there.
Another story on intuitive hunches and signs… in the summer of 2015 I started running into many people who talked to me about kundalini. It was very strange how random the people were… one was a guy I met while hitchhiking in Canada. Another was a server in a restaurant. My life coach at the time was a kundalini teacher. I met another guy while traveling who had trained in kundalini. All of this occurred in the span of about a month. What’s more, I hadn’t asked any of these people about the kundalini practice.. it just came up in conversation!
I had this strong feeling that I needed to get into a kundalini class right away. I actually even put it off for a while because I had this intuitive sense that I was going to fall HARD for the practice.. and I already had a ton of other stuff going on. But I kept getting these inner nudges to go to a class, go to a class.
Sure enough, the very first class I took with my teacher was so powerful, I decided right then and there I was going to do the teacher training. I did — and am so grateful because kundalini has shaped my life, my routines, my meditation practice, and the entire way I coach in my business. I can’t believe I almost didn’t listen to my intuition on this one!
2) You start seeing little signs and opportunities appear
The last year or so that I worked a full-time job was magical in many ways for me. I got offered a string of speaking engagements, opportunities to group coach others, an opportunity to co-lead a wellness retreat, a weekly meditation class where I was able to teach students all my spiritual energy tools. I was featured on a wellness podcast and even got an opportunity to teach a live corporate meditation class that also got recorded for the company’s 900+ employees. I got put on camera for that event and felt like a total movie star😍 A few women in my weekly meditation class told me I should start selling my meditations because they would buy them. These were all signs from the universe saying, “Hey, you’ll be fine. There are opportunities here.”
By the way, it doesn’t have to be big flashing signs that you’re seeing. Maybe you dream of traveling the world and you start seeing your dream travel country pop up in many random places. Say you’re wanting to go to the South of Spain – and one day you see an email advertising discounted fares to that country. Then maybe you meet someone in a grocery store who’s from the region and starts talking to you about it. You then leave the store and trip while you’re walking outside.. and when you look up, you’re standing right in front of a Spanish restaurant. These little signs are all easy to disregard but believe it or not, they are ways that the universe is communicating to you.
3) When your current situation becomes almost unbearable
I remember working one of my old jobs and being so confused at how much of a struggle it had started to feel like. And I don’t mean in the sense that it was hard. I worked a job that I was good at, that was in a mostly positive environment with a lot of responsibility and leadership opportunities, and it was a job that I really loved. At one point it had even been my dream job.
But despite all this, there came a point when it felt like a real struggle to go in and sit there and do the same thing day after day. I hated making the trek into work everyday, riding the subway, being stuck in crowds of people. I felt done with the work culture, with the city life, with the constant rushing around and having to be so out there. It was a full-bodied pain, a drudgery that felt like my soul was being sucked away. It became almost unbearable and I had to start giving myself pep talks to work my spirit up and keep my energy high.
This was extremely disheartening for me because at the same time I still loved so many things about that job. That’s when it became clear to me that it wasn’t even so much the particular work I was doing but the fact that I wanted to be the boss of my own schedule and life. I craved freedom from traditional job constraints, I craved travel and adventure, and I wanted OUT of the city environment. It was time for me to exercise my wings.
I want to point out that no matter what you’re doing in life, whether it be backpacking the world or engaged in your passion project, there will be days where some aspects feel boring and blah and even unbearable. But those days should not outnumber your wonderful days… not by a long shot. Pay attention if they start adding up.
4) When the pain of not doing it becomes more intense than the pain of doing it
I had all these big scary fears around failing and not being good enough that kept me from taking the leap towards self-employment for a long time. But there was a big pain in my heart that never went away and that I couldn’t reconcile because it stemmed from not going for my dreams. I tried distracting myself with all the nice things I could buy with my comfy paychecks and sometimes that did the trick for a little while. I went on some very nice holidays. Work distracted me too – my job was usually busy and I was frequently working even when I wasn’t in the office. But the pain eventually always returned.
During this period, I did learn a lot about what really motivates me though – I am someone who’s deeply driven by personal growth, contribution and self-expression. I NEED to be expressing my thoughts and feelings, ideally through the written word to feel well. I NEED to be constantly growing and becoming more of who I’m supposed to be and I NEED to feel like I’m helping others rise in their own lives. If these 3 things aren’t happening on a regular basis, it’s practically a guarantee that I will soon become depressed and feel totally lost. I tried my very best to fill my free time with these things while working a full-time job but it wasn’t nearly enough… there came a point when the pain in my heart became a cry, then a scream, then a raving maniac that I could find no escape from.
At this point, I had to deal with facing all my fears around why I was refusing to take action towards where I wanted to be. This was incredibly scary having to come face to face with all my demons… to be honest, not all of them have even been cleared yet. And I still have all these moments when I almost give up. If anyone reading this is an entrepreneur, I’m sure you can relate… doing this work is a million times harder and much more work than a 9-5 job where you have guaranteed, bi-weekly paychecks coming in. I have to constantly stay on top of my schedule and become a pro at motivating myself or else stuff doesn’t get done – there is no manager or boss to report to who keeps you accountable.
But even though it’s hard, I know I won’t give up because there’s a force in me that’s driving – a need and pain to create and help others and bring light into this world – and that force is a thousand times stronger than all my fears.
I think this is important to consider with any big thing you want in life – ask yourself, “How bad do I want it?” “How hard am I willing to work for it?” “What would I be willing to give up or turn down to get it?”
Remember that job I mentioned that at one point had been my dream job? Want to know how I got it? Before that job opportunity ever even existed in the world, I remember making a decision that I was not going to work anymore mediocre jobs…. that the next job I took was going to be my dream job or nothing. I probably turned down half a dozen other well-paying job offers before that one had even come up because I was determined to get what I wanted.
I feel like that determination and clarity is what gets us through the hard, painful, frustrating times when we feel like giving up. Your pain around NOT doing it must be stronger than your fears.
5) When your life starts falling apart and/or you have a total breakdown
Ok so it’s not a guarantee that this will happen… but I have talked to enough people over the years who’ve told me that it took a total life shattering for them to really go for that thing they most wanted. It took hitting rock bottom for them to find their true path. I can definitely echo this statement – it was only after losing the ability to walk in 2013 that I began really reforming how I lived. I started traveling solo after that happened. I started prioritizing travel in my life, and I also started creating firm boundaries in my life around work. It was like I had no more fear because I had experienced my life almost coming to an end. When something like that happens, suddenly the fear of blowing a ton of money on travel or disappointing your employer seems totally miniscule in comparison.
Everyone’s situation is different but if you’re currently in the middle of a life shattering due to a breakup, illness, job loss, home loss, death in the family, accident, etc… and you feel like your whole world is coming apart at the seams, you’re hurting and devastated… know that low points like these in life often end up being our biggest wake-up call. After things like this happen, we often feel called to make big changes in our life. We might finally start prioritising something we want in life or we might get involved in something we had never explored before and discover a new passion, a new opportunity, a new path to be on.
It was about a year ago that I lost my job and longterm home, literally one month apart from each other, for totally unrelated reasons. At the time I was thinking the universe must really hate me or something because my life as I knew it completely fell apart. But looking back now with more perspective, I can see that this happened in divine timing because I was truly ready to start doing what I had been dreaming about. I was ready and I was also still not willing to take action… so the universe gave me a little HUGE budge to get me off the path I was on! I can appreciate it now but it truly sucked when it happened.
The lesson I learned from this is: if you KNOW it’s time for you to take the leap, don’t ignore the signs and put off doing it for too long. At some point, the universe will create circumstances that force you to take action because you are unwilling to do so on your own – and those circumstances may not always be pleasant!
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At the end of the day, I believe that if there’s a certain call you keep returning to again and again, you’re probably meant to follow it for some reason. The things we want in life are not random. We just live in a world that teaches us all these reasons why it’s not safe, not practical, not worth going for what we really want – and most of us will consequently need to spend some time doing the deep inner work of breaking free from those mindsets and limiting beliefs.
I’m always here as a coach if you find yourself stuck and struggling with this part. It’s a tough but necessary step in our rising.
“The biggest adventure you can take is to live the life of your dreams.” -Oprah Winfrey
So what’s your big dream? I’m curious to know what you’re working on and what’s important to you. Let me know in the comments below!💗